Fathers day

Seriously?! I struck the lottery big time with Josh. Not only is he an amazing husband but he is a father like I would have never known. He is so loving and patient with the kids. He is an awesome example of the man I wish Logan to grow to be and the kind of man I long for Kinsey to seek in a husband. 
I pray that the kids one day know how incredibly blessed they are to have him as a dad. 
We sent daddy out for a day of golf with papa to celebrate fathers day. I surprised him with the news the night before that I had set up a tee time for them. It was much overdue and I am so glad he got to have a day doing something he loves.

We love you Josh!

VBS

2 weeks ago Kinsey got ZAPPED by Gods love at vbs. This was her first legit year (last year 3 year olds got to go if their parents worked vbs).

Highlights according to Kinsey:

   The awesome yellow slap bracelet that each kid had in their groups color

   The bracelet craft they made with beads that turn colors in the sun

   Taking offering everyday so that the 4 year olds could beat the 5 year olds

The program Friday night was adorable. Amazingness seeing tons of littles on stage singing their hearts out for God. Although Kinsey did not sing or dance but rather stood there with her finger in her mouth, she was amazing nonetheless. 

                                            Kinsey holding a note up that she made for her                                                     teacher!:) Presh!

Kate is 1 month

Kate turned one month old last week. It is so hard to believe she has been in our lives for a whole month. It has passed so quickly yet it seems like she has always been a part of our family.
She is still up every few hours to eat at night. She starts out in the top of her swing and then ends up in bed with me during the night. She loves to be swaddled and sleeps best the tighter she is:)
She weighed 5lbs 6oz and is wearing premie clothes still. Although a few of those are getting snug. She is in newborn diapers. 
She is awake for longer periods of time and is making good eye contact. 
She lays on her tummy and can turn her head from one side to the next although it is a challenge for her. 
She doesn't seem to mind her carseat except when we stop at stoplights. Then she lets out a cry to let us know she wants to be moving again:)
Her big brother and sister love to hold and kiss her. There is no shortage of love in this home for her:)
She is such a blessing to our family and has taught us so much in the short time she has been here. 
I am expecting her to be behind on some of her milestones which has been the hardest part for me. No mom wants to think their child may not be able to do things that other babies their age are but I must remember that she is still so small. So for now I will give her time and lots and lots of love!!
Cheers to packing on some fat and holding that head up really well at month #2!

Kinseys last day of school

To say that life has been a bit overwhelming lately is an understatement. So forgive me for my perpetual state of being behind at nearly everything. 
Kinsey finished her second year of Kids Day Inn at church and she loved it. She went once a week on Mondays from 9:15 to 1:15. She had a couple of her friends in her class and made a few more. 
I love hearing all about her days and who she played with. She is very good at giving the low down gossip on who threw rocks at who and who did not want to be friends with how while everyone was on the playground. 
Her teachers were Mrs. Saville and Mrs. Rollins. They were great with her. 
Her good friends Colton and Ian were in her class this year and she made a new friend named Francesca. 
She came home with crafts each day and I have noticed a great improvement in her coloring skills this year. We have been practicing writing her name at home this year and it is almost legible!:)
This year has been one of great growth for Kinsey. I feel like she has matured a ton this year. She tends to be a watcher when it comes to group activities and will attempt something once she has seen it be done a time or two. She tends to be a rule follower and thrives from acknowledgment from her parents or teachers. She has also grown a lot physically. She is much taller and her features have become more child like rather than the chubby toddler. 
She is such a blessing to us and we truly can't imagine life without her. 
Cheers to preschool next year (tears for mom)!

                                                                       First day of school
                                                                             

                                                                         Last day of school

Kates Diagnosis

This is a tough post for me and I am in the thick of all of the emotions that something like this will bring to a family.
Let me start at the beginning. I had scheduled a two week appointment with my ob to check my surgical scar after the c section. Once there he brought me a piece of paper and said that he was a little confused. He said that this was the report from pathology after sending my placenta off to be tested to see if they could find a reason Kate had stopped growing. He said the report showed that the placenta had "characteristics of CMV (cytomegalovirus)." This was a virus we had been tested for back when I was 20 weeks pregnant and our sonogram showed the abnormalities in Kates liver and bowel. The results showed that I was positive for a primary infection (which is not abnormal and did not pose a threat to the baby) but negative for an acute infection (in which cases the babies usually do not live past a few days old and have lots of deformities at birth). So for the last 23 weeks we have thought we were in the "all clear" for a CMV infection. My doctor had taken Kate out of the car seat at that point and was loving on her. He said he was confused because she seemed so perfect and babies with CMV infections would not have made it this long. In his words "she is not a CMV baby." He was very honest and said that he needed to call Kates pediatrician and the pediatric infectious disease doctor as he was not sure where to go from here. So he did just that while we were in his office. Together the 4 of us talked via speaker phone and it was determined that we needed to have Kate tested for CMV virus. We were told to go to the lab and obtain an urine sample and we would have the results in a week or so.
Longest week of my life! To be completely honest I had really blocked it out. In my mind she was perfect and did not have CMV.
So last Thursday when Kates pediatrician called and said that she was positive for CMV it hit my like a ton of bricks. That sick to your stomach feeling. That feeling like you have no idea how you will make it to the next hour. How could this happen to her? After all we have been through?
What to do now? This virus is very complex and I still do not have a good understanding of the acute vs symptomatic natures of it.
Kates pediatrican called and said that we needed to have a bunch of testing done. Monday we had an appmt with a pediatric opthamalogist as some babies with this will be blind. On Wednesday we had an appmt to have a CT of her brain because some of these babies will have lesions in their brains that will lead to seizure disorders and developmental delays. We will also have a sono of her liver that day to see if the calcifications are still there. And on Thursday we went to the audiologist because some of these babies will be deaf.
That is a lot to take in for a mom of a newborn via phone conversation with your childs doctor.
Great news is that her vision is perfect! 
On Wednesday we were told that the ultrasound of her brain showed no calcifications or lesions and that she would most likely not have any seizure disorder or developmental delays. Praise Jesus. The dr did say that he say two small "blobs" on both sides of the open spaces in her brain and they were of the same size and they indicated that she had a small brain bleed in utero. Wow!! He said that they measured so small they did not even register on the scale they use to measure them and that they would not cause any future problems. Her liver still showed the exact same calcifications as they did while I was pregnant and they had not multiplied or grown. Wonderful news again. 
On Thursday we went to the audiologist and were told after a bunch of tests that she is "profoundly deaf" in her right ear. Her left ear is perfect. There is no hearing in the right ear therefore she would not even be eligible for a hearing aid. The audiologist told us that there was virtually no chance for her to regain that hearing. And also the way CMV works there is about a 50% chance she will lose the hearing in her left ear over time. So the plan will be to continually moniter the left ear and should we notice that she is losing some hearing in that ear she will immediately get a hearing aid. Should she lose all of the hearing in that ear then she would be eligible for a cochlear implant. The audiologist told us that if things were to stay the way they were with the left ear being great then her speech and language should develop completely normal. The only thing would be some minor modifications such as reducing background noise and possible preferential seating in her classroom as she starts in school. My heart is very hopeful with her current diagnosis but a part of me is saddened to think that she may feel different than her peers or possibly be made fun of. Part of me is saddened that she isnt completely "perfect" as we think of in this world. But I remain joyful in the fact that she is made perfect in the eyes of God. I know He did not want Kate to have this hearing loss but I know He can use it for good. I know that she is a very loved little girl and I know that she has a support system of people that are committed to loving her exactly the way she is. 
On Monday we have her 1 month appointment and my hope is to gain a little more information about the progression of this virus and what the future looks like for Kate. But as of now I will rejoice in the perfect little girl we have. I will be thankful for every second I spent with her and the sweet family God has blessed me with.